Creating positive behavior with a positive action

After we've heard a lot and get used to hearing positive words, sentences good, right messeges, then we apply the positive talk, namely by issuing positive words, good words. After we see and direct our vision and children to the positive things, and we continually invest and familiarize yourself think positive, then the next step to implement positive action.

Parents do not just age alone is more than the kids, but all the act should reflect the horn as a parent. Someone who is experienced, knowledgeable people, people who provide good role models. Act positively through exemplary pattern is the one of effective method than telling or forcing a child to become this and that. That would eventually lead to one point is certain, which is positive.

Like it or not, consciously or unconsciously, every day we, our children are bombarded with negative energy. It was already crowded world with a negative influence. The most important role in the family who respond to and neutralize negative energy. Family role is to always radiate positive energy to cultivate individuals who are positive.

Add to families as an educational center to drive our kids to the front gate of the brighter, toward a bright future.

Parent attitudes Open Mind in receiving feedback from others, the attitude of parents who are open to criticism, will add maturity of his soul in educating his children. Attitude willing to learn the parents to increase their capacity as parents, will ease the way to manage and bring the "ship" on the right track.

Reflect the attitude of the parents themselves are open on the shortage and ignorance, coupled with great determination to curiosity and willing to learn from others, will help make parents as a tolerant person, democratic, and patient. As a parent, the father and the mother should not feel ashamed to always ask for help, or ask taught. Nothing to be hidden for the sake of preparing for the education of children, there is nothing to be ashamed to prepare for the future of children.

What do you think?

Creating positive behavior with positive thinking

I parted away with my best friend almost 17 years old, I wander to Bekasi, and my friends migrate to Riau, every Lebaran arrived I hoped to meet with my friends. However, there are also met. The desire to meet with my friend that's always hanging my mind, when I can meet. Phone number or his cell phone did not have, did not know her address. I would like to contact anyone? That thought kept tempting me. Until finally at some point, I actually met with my friend.

Maybe you've experienced something like that? You think of something very desirable, and one day what she thought was true?

A girl always thinking about having an ideal partner, good, and responsible. Of course with the criteria that he had in mind. Then what he thought two years was achieved.
The things we think about and realized, is not a coincidence. Apparently the power of the mind like a magnet that can draw power and suck up everything that we consider to be realized. Our minds will be able to move the whole part of us like the physical, emotional, spirit and action to move toward what we think. If our minds are focused on success, certainly a success which will be obtained. Conversely, if our minds focused on the failure, then failure that we will encounter.

What about children who "low battery" left in the lesson at his school, unlike what was envisioned by a parent? Options that exist in the parents, because the parents are more responsible and better understand everything, not children. So, choose which positive think that will bring positive energy? or negative thinking that will produce negative fruit? Of course we will choose first, that is to think positive. Continue to develop and cultivate a positive mind in ourselves, that our children will one day become a smart boy, will grow into a good boy, good son. Thoughts and prayers along with the business. Insha Allah.
A mother went to her homeroom teacher at the school. He expressed his worry because there has been no improvement in the lesson. The tutor has been brought to the house, but still, this kid is still lagging. Various attempts have been made, consult with your doctor, gave a nutritious food, more attention, but still no change.

Hearing the laments of the mother, the guardian class was suggested that the mother remains upbeat and always thinking positive. Every day the mother kept trying to think positive and believe that one day his son will be like what he was thinking. Until finally the child was "released" from elementary school. He went on to junior high school, yes not a favorite junior high or junior high seed because his lunch was mediocre. But what happened? even after the child was sitting in the Junior accomplishments stand out. They are often activated in many activities at her school. Ah impossible? No. Nothing is impossible.
In everyday life we are often faced with two choices, yes or no, could or could not. Children who are facing a test, often thought if I could replicate it or not doing? Likewise with adults when to do things, whether they could or not? Can or can not, those thoughts will determine a person succeeds or fails in doing something.

If we think that we can do something, then be assured that we will be. Likewise in educating children, plant in mind that we can take him to a better direction. Despite having to go through various obstacles, but with the conviction that we are able, then the odds that it will make us become more mature, wiser and more patient. Positive thoughts with the word "may" is a great strength to achieve success. Mind "could" be a strong move to make a dream come true, creativity, producing a variety of strategic alternatives, encourage the spirit to continue and keep trying, and will seek. While it may initially seem difficult. However, in the end we will be able and successful.

Conversely, if we think negatively by saying on our minds with the words "can not" be allowed to cover the chance to do something because it can not be convicted. With these words can not, then the desire will be discontinued, the possibilities will not be attempted, attempts to stop.

Choose can or can not?

Creating positive habit with a positive showing

Showing the positive in the sense that we should bring our vision into positive things, good things. Keep our eyes from something negative. Because inevitably what we see will be recorded in memory and certainly will affect the mindset at least, our speech patterns, even patterns may affect our actions.

Positive view can also mean that we must see things from a positive standpoint, that means distancing us from the negative prejudices. By always see things from a positive standpoint, it will make a person become a patient person, his demeanor calm and pleasant. Whereas if we are always negatively biased, then we will feel tired and do not waste energy on something useless.

Point your vision of our children on something good and useful. A mother or father, should not show any private parts in front of the kids, or impolite dressed in front of children. If so, indirectly, parents teach their children to dress impolitely.

Bring the kids on the spectacle that lead to good things. And if forced to watch bad impressions, then the Lead and provide guidance, understanding by speaking positively of course. There is a saying that "better to see once than hear a thousand times." This shows how great the power of showing. Because the view will be recorded in a permanent memory.

No matter how we want to forget what we've seen, it is a vision of time it would appear out of nowhere.

Trial and error are common in learning. The most important thing is to try to always guide our vision in a positive direction.

Creating a positive talk habit

If we've heard is positive, then spread the energy through positive talk, talk of polite, speak with soothing words. I have real experience dealing with this, sorry in this case not to patronize, or position as being omniscient, I just wanted to share the experience alone.

I have a student, let's say his name Hameed, his parents had "given up" with the behavior of this Hameed. Often throwing a tantrum, against the parents, hard to learn. At school too, he often disturbing friends, acting up and always behind in class. I was almost clueless face of this child, in many ways I tried, but have not succeeded as well.

Until finally, on one occasion when I was teaching the class, I announce something to my students that. I am announcing today that I was very proud to Hameed, because Hameed had shown remarkable change in attitude.

Hameed spontaneous stunned to hear my words. Certainly he was surprised, because he does not feel like what I said earlier. Similar reactions shown by other children. Changed what? That's about the questions asked of children in the classroom. I stick with the words and my standpoint that Hameed had been changed, and I'm proud of him. Yes to be honest did this child have not changed, but I'm optimistic with my words earlier.

Still, his face in amazement, I went to Hameed, congratulations for a change and shook his hand, do not forget I asked the other kids to give spirit to applaud.

My efforts to create a better Hameed did not stop there, on each occasion I gave encouragement with words of encouragement "Mr Hameed's very proud of you changes, continue to improve it!" Hameed nodded. That continues, while occasionally I give him the responsibility, strengthening-reinforcement, praise, and others.

Gradually, this kid really changed 180 degrees. Temperament for the better, be more diligent in learning, no longer interfere with his garden. Gradually improved his performance and showed graph continues upward.

There is a kind of encouragement in itself to change according to what he heard, there is a responsibility that must be espoused and implemented, there is a kind soul to change his call.

He did not feel was told, did not feel forced, but with the consciousness of his own, he wants to transform itself.

Make relationship with friends and people who are always talking positive is one step to train ourselves in order to get positive effects. Make friends with someone like that will spur us to see things from a positive standpoint, it will affect the attitudes, actions and decisions which are made positive.

What if the children speak negative words, dirty words are inappropriate? For older people, we should not directly blame the child, but try to straighten with a positive conversation through dialogue. Dialogue of a heart-to-heart. Are not judgmental. Provide corrective strengthening the character, but still within the corridor are constructive.

Realizing how the words consisting only of the order of alphabets and the impact it has tremendous power and could have a negative impact. If not managed wisely, then there are the filters that should be done first before we talk with the children or with other family members. The words are not good should be ingested alone or in deeply buried or just thrown away, to maintain good communication with family. By choosing positive words, communication will remain conducive and harmonious.

Be very careful in speaking, because of wrong-wrong will become a boomerang for ourselves. To remember is that children differ greatly from today's children a bygone era. Children today tend to be more mature and easier to understand something. More daring in speaking, and his mind is more open. Kids these days are now more daring to criticize their parents.

Sounding good and positive words or musics to create positive habit

Often many people underestimate the hearing aspect. Yet if we think the first activities undertaken by humans when the new born is heard. He could not speak let alone seen. Even before he was born too many parents sound off the verses of the holy Qur’an, the praise, classical songs, or invited talk by the mother or the father.

Indeed hearing is a passive activity, but good listening is an active activity. Because he will focus his attention to aspects that would be heard. Good listening will bring the atmosphere to be better communication. Relation to hear the positive, as parents should provide the ears with vitamin intake is good, with sentences that are positive, such as religious lectures, the verses of the holy Qur`an, recitation, recitation, the Islamic group study etc. .

Decorate your heart with a lot to hear the advice of the wise, Islamic Teachers, Muslim scholar, the speaker, someone who is experienced, or the motivator, trainer, and so forth.

With a lot to hear positive things, it will be imprinted on the hearts of positive words. The words are beautiful, evocative string of sentences, and so forth. Sure would be transmitted to their children through the beautiful words of all, the soothing words, a decent person and a positive energy that radiated through the emitted which will affect, influence members of his family, and took him to the road by his submission.

It would be good if there are no parents who are always out of negative words to her children, for example, you fool, you're ugly, you're embarrassing, the basic stubborn, rebellious child, and so forth. If the words are always heard the child, then there is tendency of the child will do what he had heard it. It is possible that children would be really stupid, really stubborn, and would shame the family with he did

As I say that words are like a double-edged sword, if we're wrong to use it, it will be cutting yourself. So, sounding good words, manners, and beautiful. If parents want children to do things according to our will, then do not by compulsion, not a detraction or scolding, but with a sweet invitation, a call is evocative, and so forth.

Family as The Center of The Positive Energy

Most of the time children spent in the family environment. Hence, the family environment is very dominant task in educating children. In the family in various activities children and other family members, such as listening, speaking, learning, reading, thinking, acting, hanging out, and other widely used.

One child had not only spent his time dwelling in a family environment, as a social being he had to socialize with a wider environment, that is society. Knowingly or not, when the kids socialize in a community environment is a lot of influence and the negative things go. What is heard, what is seen, what is felt will contribute to the development of children.

When the boy was playing with friends, maybe he saw someone else indiscriminate spitting, littering, and maybe he saw people fighting, or seeing things that are simply not appropriate for a child, for example, saw adult dating, hugging or even (sorry) kissing. Knowingly or not all the views will be recorded in its memory, and if this is going on constantly, then will gradually form a pattern of habits that will be copied and performed.

Perhaps the social activities, the child accidentally heard the words that do not deserve such harsh hear people talk, listen to adults or peers cursing, swearing, curses, or the words "filthy". Inevitably it will at least influence the pattern of speaking of the child.

Or maybe when the kids play with his friends, he felt the treatment of his friends or others who do not wear, such as being beaten, hit on the head, kicked or pointed at by others. It will also affect the patterns and behaviors toward children. Perhaps the child becomes quiet or vice versa children become more aggressive and mimicking what he feels.

Often we hear there is a mother complained about a problem child because he feels at home have been educating their children properly, teach manners, behave well guided and so forth, but when children go into society as if what is taught is the raw return by the severity of negative effects of existing within the community. Then, many parents who later forbade his children to mix with other children, or a society with a wider audience again for fear that the patterns and the negative effects will affect the development of the child.

However, are we going to sacrifice the freedom and rights of children to enjoy their childhood? Do we have the heart to spend his time locked child in the house without socializing with children or other people? Of course as a good parent would not do like that, because it can affect the mental development of children. Children will be an individualist, a quiet man, or even to grow as individuals priori to others. Will foster self-righteous pomposity, and the judge that another person is wrong.

The most important thing is that as parents still guarantee the rights of children are met, the children feel the beauty of the play, to enjoy his world. The parents are obligated to keep trying and trying to neutralize negative influences and energy from the environment of the child adopted form their playground. Neutralize the patterns of guidance, education, referrals, invitations, and others who are positive. Task of the parents and other family members to continue raising the awareness in the child, that the negative things he had heard, that he saw and what he feels is incorrect and does not deserve to be done. The pattern of awareness is carried out not by way of errands, coerced, threatened, or the yelling and cursing. However, the pattern is done by raising awareness of compassion which was genuine, said a gentle word, a smile a warm, intimate relationships, and provided a good example or role model. Then the children will be with full awareness and understanding will be able to differentiate between good and which ones are not good, which may be done and what not to do.

Patterns of education, counseling, referrals, invitations, and example given to children, Being aware or not all this activity is closely linked to the words. Without a word, nothing could be heard. Without words, no one can talk about. Without words, no one could be written. Without words, no one can read and nobody can understand.

We all know that words have tremendous power (words are powerful), can still remember the experimental rice? The researchers and speakers at the seminars, the trainers and motivators have to understand, feel, and proved the power of words.
The power of words are like a double-edged sword. If used properly, it will provide huge benefits for us. But on the contrary, if we use it incorrectly, it is not impossible that we will face disasters.

Give Your Children The Right to Enjoy Their World

Michael included a bright child in the class, In the case of accomplishments, He is the most superior compared to his peers. In addition to performance, his attitude is good, almost never makes trouble in class. Test values, duties and homework have always had the highest value. There is only one deficiency, namely the problem of socialization with friends less so.

When the rest time, children generally play in the other class pages, or joking with friends, running around, eating together, exchanging stories, or other things that typically do the school children at the time hour break. Another case with Michael, almost every day at recess spent his time reading, eating even in the classroom with supplies brought from home as well as reading. It is not wrong, but I see there is something missing.

To find out what the hell was the natural child, I wore my old stance, which I accompanied him to eat in class. Indeed he looked awkward at first, but after trying again and again it was done, he finally got used to it. I also do not forget to find out what her favorite, she did love the character Naruto. I tried to find literature on this Naruto character. Once I have the stock of knowledge about the character of this idol, I invited him to discuss the problem Naruto.

He was so enthusiastic at all. Once he feels close to me emotionally, she began to tell why he is like that, it turns out this kid brings a very heavy burden on his shoulders. He was targeted by her parents to always be a class champion, while also he was an ultimatum in order not to embarrass his family. As it turns out that his father was a well respected lecturer, his mother was a teacher. So, he should not embarrass the family.

I asked myself, where the rights of this child? His right to play, feel the beauty of childhood, her right to happiness as a children, should their rights for the sake of ambition and prestige mortgaged by parents?

I remember what was said by my Math teacher, she has a son, but he did not feel worried that their children do not master multiplication, he did not feel worried that their children are not good at mathematics as father. "People who are good at math, not necessarily his life will be better than people who are not good at math," he said. she let her son grow with interest, with his talent without this burden should be or become it. As parents duty is to drive, teach, and drove him toward a better future.

Parenting Tips : Be Positive (2)

Imagine if we unknowingly continually give something negative, negative words to our children, what will happen? Negative experiences suffered by children, will hamper or cripple a child's development. For example, a child who has bad writing, is always humiliated by his friends, even his teacher says that her writing was bad and could hardly be read. Boy's desire to improve the post disappeared, because every child wants to try to write beautiful, when it was also an inscription he never gets the credit. In his mind already obsessed by that bad writing. Any attempt to learn to write beautifully, so that there are minds is bad writing.

I have the experience which was very surprising to me and I immediately thought back to what I have done? On one occasion, I met a handsome young man, his skin white and clean, in my heart to say this child was beautiful! Suddenly the young man came up to me and kissed my hand. Of course, young children who is surprised, he knew my name, too.

After I asked, he replied, "Do you remember me? I am Juliet, Sir. The former pupil who are punished in front of the class because it not to work on homework sir! "He explained. I tried to remember, but still do not remember well when that happens. Really I never do anything like that? I still can not remember it, but young children are so detailed to tell the events that had passed many years and though it is still fresh in his mind, as if it happened yesterday.

I also immediately apologize to this young child. Thank’s God, he can understand, it was his fault, he said. Still covered with my guilty feelings toward this young man, I'm trying to ask, why is he still remembers that experience? Then he replied, "Yes sir remember, I was so embarrassed, and that I could not forget!" Forgive us, God. So I quickly rushed home and once again I apologize to my students that.

Another case with a positive experience. Positive experience it can develop a child's personal. With these experiences children become mature and appreciation of his life will become broader. For example a child is having difficulty in answering math problems, once when he managed to find a way of problem-solving mathematics. The success of these kids get compliments from people - people in surrounding areas, parents, teachers or friends. Armed with that experience, children will be encouraged to answer every question he gets.

Another example, a child who wishes to become a champion class, then the child is studying diligently all subjects. Although these children have not managed to become the champion class, without a sense of hopelessness and always received encouragement and motivation from people around them such as teachers, parents, friends, businesses are finally paying off. At the end of the lesson, the child becomes the champion class. It was an experience that is very beautiful and extraordinary.

Mistakes and failures are part of the learning process. We do not judge someone because he do wrong or fail. However, if we want to develop good personal, then we certainly will continue to provide encouragement, motivation and prayer in order to obtain good results. The experience is a lesson to do better than before, as the saying goes, "Experience is the best teacher."
Something big thing, usually starts from something small. I remember the adage spoken by my teacher, "People who are successful did not mean never falling, but immediately got up after falling."

Parenting Tips : Be Posistive (1)

At a seminar, all participants were asked to sit upright and quiet with her eyes closed. He gave suggestions to us to imagine being in a beautiful place, namely at the beach. We were asked to imagine being in a beautiful beach, accompanied by the melodious music, good food, fresh drinks, along with those we love, but do not imagine with a monkey!

What happened? We are asked to forget the monkeys, but monkeys are actually just shadows appear, do not carry a monkey, but monkey is precisely our mind flashed. The more we are asked to forget the monkey, the monkey was in fact emerged clearly.

Apparently the human mind, can not accept the things that are negative, including negative words. No wonder, when I told my students in class to be quiet, even more noise. Departing from there, I was reflecting. There's something wrong! During the time that I think is right and has become a natural phenomena, it turns out wrong. Something that has become a habit, it must be changed the pattern, because it is less precise.

Changing the negative things into positive things. Changing the negative words with positive words. As a first step I tried at home to my own children. During the time when I have my child not to play all the way, I say, "Do not play the way yes!" It turned out that my child is actually playing into the distance.

"Do not stay long game! "My child was even old enough to play well. It's only a few small examples. The more children are prohibited to do something, the greater the tendency to do things that we are forbidden.

From the results of reflection, I am committed to trying to change the pattern. My little experiment, when my son wanted to play with friends, I did not say, "Do not go too far!" But I said, 'Just play anywhere near, please! "Or I say," co-star moment, yes, sir! "When I initially said," Don’t be naughty boy! "This time I replace it with the phrase," Be a good boy, yes, sir! "What were the results?

It was remarkable. My child is still small, but with such a simple pattern changes, there are remarkable changes. My child has become more obedient, more disciplined. Conforming is not because of fear, but because he had a sense of responsibility.

It is to start something new, it is usually difficult. Sometimes there are strange feelings, embarrassment, and even hesitated to begin. In fact, we asked ourselves whether this path is correct or not? Successful or not? How to begin?

I am sure, and we all agreed that learning is a process. Can not be instantaneous and direct. Like building a bridge to connect two places separated by a wide gulf and deep. Start it was difficult, requiring time, effort, cost, and the mind. How to build a bridge that is strong, strong, safe, and durable and can provide great benefits?

Certainly require a long thought and process. Not instant. However, if done with diligence, with a strong determination, good planning, with conviction and dedication.
Bridge could be built with good success. People can enjoy the bridge for various activities. Well, if you already like this, our hard work, the difficulties faced, the sacrifices and others, as if it never happened and we never experienced.

To be continued...